Okuu Loves her Wings

Okuu loved her wings, more for what they meant then what they were or did. She did love their blackness; somewhere between the rough surface of basalt and the sharp reflections of obsidian. She loved how soft and warm they were when she wrapped them around her self. She loved how big they were; how she could by stretching them full out, brush buildings on each side of the market street. She loved how big they made her look, how she could grab the attention of a room, or stare down any of her fellow hellcrows. She loved how she could half fold them so they formed an aura around her, a black heart framing her. She loved how strong they were. stronger than her arms or legs. How they could hold her against the air, lift up her body into the air. Hows she could move each feather to subtle shift the flow of air. How they let her fly! But more than all those things she loved them for what they meant, and for that same reason she hated them.

The wings meant that she was not by nature a person, but a beast, a wild thing. The Satori and the Oni were people they could speak and think and plan and clothe themselves, but the hellcrows, Okuu's people, weren't, by nature, people. Her mother never said I love you, her siblings had mostly died, and those who hadn't were either wild beasts or failed experiments. Her people fought and rutted and died, all without telling their story, all without counting more than 5, or how to ask a stranger's name.

Okuu had, with her owner, her savior, pulled herself up, out of that pit, but it still called, sang, pulled at her. Sometime the decades of practice, the years of ritual, the iron will she had built up, the lessons she had learned, sometimes it was not enough. He mind would be overrun with boiling, thunderous, roiling, unshaped needs and fears, twisting images of pain and pleasure. Her stomach or her loins would ache with need, her wings would flap in fear, her voice would ring out in anger. Or sometimes there would be silence, her mind would shatter into pieces, some still connected to her senses, others to her body, others just lonely voices in her head speaking into a void. Other times it would be as if she, that part of her that could speak and think and plan, was only an observer, a foreign dignitary in her own body, busily writing ignored complaints.

Still over all she loved her wings. She loved what she had managed to do, what her owner, the Lady Komeiji, had let her achieve. Most of the time the practices worked. Her will held. The rituals calmed and tamed her mind. She could speak, and plan, and think of others. She could help her fellows, she could be a person and not a beast, and she felt that was worth more than what those who had it given to them by nature could ever know.

Okuu also loved eggs, but that was for a much simpler reason, they tasted good boiled.

Lunar Eclipse: Prolog

Commissioner Kamishirasawa, Keine Kamishirasawa, sipped at her tea. The room she was in, was darkened, as she preferred, when alone.  It was an open secret that the Kamishirasawa line had youkai traits, but even given the new unity in the wake of the Lunar Empire's declarations, it was not politic to remind people of her nature.

However, her office was closed, most of the floor empty.  Only a few brave or foolish souls working overtime were left. Like her, they stared at multiple screens, physical security keys lying on their desk looking like ancient tablets of authority. Sometimes even a few sheets of physical paper were scattered on the surface.

Here was where history was decided, where truth and story and secret swap their clothes.  Whole cities were hidden and created every week, the layers of conspiracy and misrecording carefully nurtured into a thicket of deception.

After all the New Earth Government was, by Law, a democracy.

The 'Rule of Law' and the 'Will of the People' were their highest principles, and therefore in the War, their greatest weaknesses.  For what were society, wealth, justice, and peace, but each a madness of the crowd? And the Moon ruled Madness.  The traitors had weakened the Moon's power significantly, but they were no more trustworthy then their former masters, and while the Moon might not care what their wayward daughters had done on Earth, the Kamishirasawa remembered the disasters they had arranged.

Right now, Kamishirasawa was skimming Greater California's Minerstry of Transportation's last few Monthly Reports. It had the proper conclusions, and showed the requisite priority shifts, but the security level 2H version of the report did indeed seem to be missing a number of expenditures that should have  been there at that clearance level and topic. With them missing the expenditures at the 3C level were obvious.

The team had recommended that this should be quietly mentioned to Dyson Lmt. They had quietly bribed the Minister after all and would rebuke her also quietly.  If done right her superiors should never have to acknowledge the mistake.  This would in turn strengthen the Dyson groups anti-war sentiments, and therefore strengthen the resolve of their opponents.

Kamishirasawa ultimately decided that she approved, though they were pushing against safe limits of infighting in the California Ministry and might have to cull the ranks a bit soon.

Looking at the view-screen that showed the gibbous moon, she sighed, she had to stop giving herself busy work, just because she didn't want to think about it, didn't the signs weren't there. Even the time of the month was right.  Unregistered migratory souls were on the rise, and geothaumic energy production was almost 10% higher than expected.  Cases of Lunacy, the oldest and most obvious of the Moon's subtle warfare were on the rise. Even the Hakurei Group were moving, and they always delayed as long as they could. The last time they went to war, Makai returned to being named Mars because no citizens of the Makai Theocracy remained alive. It was time to plan for the next Monthly Audit, and this was going to be a big one.

Still, why was Tsukiyomi being so obvious? It had to mean there was something they thought they could gain now, before NGE responded. All that power, all these jabs and feints and preparations, pulled resources from the Colonies. Which was where the War had been fought so far.

Familiar of Zero: Rei no Shikigami: Spirit's Computer: Part ?3?

Chen tossed and turned. "That mouse in the rafter deserves to die, but" she grumbled and then quoted her master "'Civilized Youkai don't eat vermin.'  I don't want to eat them. I just want to play a little."

Pushing Louise's limp form over towards the wall, she slipped out of bed and pulled her off her night gown. She pulled her day-clothes on, except for her shoes. Ran's nails clattered on the floor if didn't wear something, but Chen preferred to go barefoot inside. After all she had retractable claws! She could even retract her finger nails, which didn't really make anatomical sense. Ran had explained how it worked and made her do the math by hand. That was kind of fun..but then she had made her drill until she could do a few million problems a second. That was less fun, especially the danmaku when she messed up.

She pushed with a little anti-fire mixed with anti-earth and walked into the shadow under the window, walking out in a different shadow in the hallway. Sniffing at the air, she smelled something interesting, under the human sweat and vaguely ozone like smell of her young master's magic. Walking down the hallway, in what to a human would be almost complete darkness, she carefully stalked the odor. It was coming from a room that stank of human copulation.

Chen vaguely remembered going into heat and getting mounted from her days of being a normal cat, but was happy to let it remain a memory.  Ran had said she might change her mind some day, but it was okay if she never did.

Teleporting though the door was a bit tiring, but she needed the practice.

The interesting smell infused the room. At first she thought it was coming from the pair upon the bed, but it also seemed to be sprayed into the wood of the nearby desk, and the pile of clothes by bed. The girl clothes had one set of smells and the boy's another.

The collars and shoulders seemed to have the sent the strongest.  Chen thought it almost smelled like the Red-White when she brought out her orbs.  Chen walked back to the desk, pulling her self up onto the writing surface so she could reach the cabinet nest to mirror. Opening the cabinet door pushed her back, and her left foot slipped off the lacquered wood. Chen swore, "by the Dragon's tits." She pushed desperately with her other leg, leaving deep scratches in the wood.

"Mon Mon?" one of the figures in the bed asked groggily. Chen froze hanging from the cabinet door. "Its too dark in here for a human to see" she thought, and sure enough she could see the boy shift and wrap his arm around his partner.

Chen whispered, "Phew," and pulled her self back onto the desk, this time being careful to be to the side of the cabinet as she opened it. "Jackpot!" she thought smiling.  Two racks held miscellaneous alchemy supplies, smelled more like Patchouli's though with out the metals and salts, or perhaps like Marisa with out the mushrooms and chicken broth.  But it was the third rack that held her interest:  four different bottles, the stopper loose on the leftmost.

Chen stuffed the bottles in her pockets, and then pushed her self off the desk, falling into the shadow. The darkness wrapped around her twisting and then dropping her roughly in Louise's bed, Chen shivered and unthinkingly transformed into her cat form before falling fast asleep.

Familiar of Zero: Rei no Shikigami: Spirit's Computer: Part 0

Master stuck her hand in my breast pocket and pulled the bow on my vest uncomfortably tight. "My little Chen, you have your spell-cards.  Good." she said nodding.

"Master!" I whined.

"Your dress is clean. You have the emergency seal?" she said ignoring me.

'Yes, Master." I said sighing. "I have the emergency seal, and I've memorized the recitation for access to Mayohiga."

"Do you..Young Lady! that tone.." she said to me frowning.

"Sorry Master." I said bowing, this was the 4th time we had gone over these, and she kept messing with my clothing.

Master's Master leaned against the door frame. "Ran, she'll be fine. She has her supplies, including, as you insisted, 4 sets of clothes, and a weeks worth of underwear..you do realize that they aren't complete savages in Halkengenia? She'll be able to find clothes."

"Yukari-sama, she's going into a warzone!"

"The wars not going to start for at *least* 2 months, and probably closer to 2 years. There magic system is almost completely ineffective against youkai, and she's a NEKOMATA. Stop being a mother hen." Master's Master said, frowning at Master.

"Yes, madam." Master said almost robotically.  I hated seeing her like this..Master's Master would get so angry at this emotionless act of hers. Sometimes she even hits Master with the umbrella. They don't know that I've seen that though.

"Ran, I'm not asking you to not care about her. It's just we need our little Chen to learn, to grow a little, and us youkai don't do that unless we're pushed.

"Now Chen, remember that these people aren't as tough as those around here, so be careful with them. Oh and there's some secrets there too so don't be too too confidant.

"But most importantly have fun and make some friends, and fight like a devil.

"Ran give her a hug, and start the spell. Now."

Master's hug was awkward, almost like she wasn't really there.  First she's messing with me too much, now she's all stiff.  I really don't like it when Master and Master's Master fight, but I tried to put as much of my love into the hug back.

"Don't worry Master, I'll write letters every week, and I'll be back before you know it."

She slowly let me go and tapped the pentagram surrounding me, muttering the finishing words.

A blue portal appeared, it felt deeper than the ones I can make, but a lot rougher than Master's Master's gaps. Waving to my masters I stepped in.

Growing Up is the Energy of the Future: I wish.

Okay, this is the third time I've posted to this thing.

I wish that all I had to write was that school was hard and one of my `friends` is being a jerk.

I wish..

But, instead I have more super weird stuff to write about..I kind of hope I am just crazy.

I mean that would suck, but it'd be better then whats going on being real.

So lets see, the last time I posted to this things had started catching fire around me.  That's changed.
I can sort of control it now.  So that's better.

I should just say _what happened._

Then maybe what I feel about it would make some sense.
---------
Just a few hours after I wrote up the last post. I was walking home, no more just walking around.  I didn't want to go home. I didn't want to deal with Lucy, not with me as scared as I was.

I don't remember where I was exactly when I felt it, this cold.  It made me angry, like someone was taking something that belonged to me.

I still don't know how I knew where it was but I did, and I ran as fast as I could, jumping into traffic with aching legs. I count my stars that I didn't hit one, but I didn't care, and as I got with in a block or so there was some sort of boundary, like jello almost, or a sticky cobweb, it wrapped around me, and then burst with a cold wind.

As I crossed over, the world slowed, and stopped, turning fuzzy, indistinct, bland.  The lighting changed from a sunny day, to a moon lit night.

The sky turning dark, black with an unnaturally bright star to the north.

And alone in this strange world was the power relay station.  It buzzed and sparked, I could see the electricity flowing through the wires.  They were pleading to me, angry and scared. "Save him, save us, save him, save us.." they chanted 60 times a second.  I knew it was at that rate, even though I could hear each word..it felt like time was more of a good idea, then the law.

It still flowed but something was pulling it in, draining it, slowing it, making the chanting warp and twist. I looked farther in and saw it.
Saw them.
There stood, there in the center of the installation, three figures.
One was the cold I could feel.  A figure of shadows and white lines, it was translucent, hallow, like a wire frame. It spoke to the next figure, a pile of mud and dirt, like a child's sculpture come to life.  "See how good it feels to cast them off? What power you hold? Is it better to live as they would have you live, a living death, sleeping in pain and confusion; or to cast off your chains, to reclaim the glory that was once yoursss" as that last 's' lengthened into a hiss, and I saw that the last figure was a normal man, held up struggling, his face turning blue as the figure of dirt choked him.

"What are you doing!" Screamed in rage. I should have been terrified, but something about the scene made me so angry, that there wasn't space in me for fear. I screamed again and threw out my arm, and from it a white hot fire fell towards the figures.

The man of shadows dodged, and seemed to fold in on it self for a second before stretching out over my head. "Show this fool your strength. She seeks your slavery." it hissed in anger.

The man of dirt turned slowly, and prodingly, my fire had melted a gouge in its back, but it seemed to not have noticed yet. "You dare show yourself now!" it spoke, dragging out its words.  "Where were.."
I didn't listen. I was too angry, I gestured cutting with my hand, and its arm fell off. Melted threw. I reached out and black darkness came with me, streams of fire melting the mud into hunks of glass before drawing them to me.

I, okay this part makes even less sense.

I ate the pieces, the molten pieces of glassed dirt.  They didn't even hurt, rather they tasted wonderful, meaty and dark, like chocolate covered stake, but you know good.

by the time I had finished, the man of white lines and shadows was gone.

and then the world seemed to shatter and time started flowing normally again, cars honked in the street. A man was studying the installation, a checklist in his hand.  He hummed, content. Not seeing me I guess.

Everything seemed normal again.  Except that I felt full. Like I had feasted, and when I scuffed the ground I saw ghostly writing, max wells equations I think, mixed in with my name, in my handwriting.

As soon as I saw that I ran home as fast as I could.

------------

So okay. I either have something like schizophrenia or magical powers. Yeah, I can make my hand glow. I think I need to tell someone.

I don't know what to do.

love,
Sky.

Growing Up is the Energy of the Future: School Started!

Originally posted 2007/9/10

-----------------------

Okay, classes started okay.  I have to take a writing class this year, and Jeff isn't teaching Poetry this year. Sad face!

But the books we are reading look mostly interesting. Though its weird how 'straight' Brave New World is.  I mean you know how TV shows these days mix in implied lesbian sex when ever they can, or some implied homoeroticism if they want to make fun of someone...sigh..we are so `enlightened`, not! Also, its weird that they can grow people in vats, but don't have the pill.

Scifi is like that a lot I mean they will have fusion powered hand guns but n

The HELL! The computer I was using just exploded! I thought I was going to get arrested..but once it was clear no-one was hurt the cops just sent everyone home and blamed it on faulty fireproofing.

I'm scared..I didn't want to talk about this but ...a garbage can caught on fire as I was walking by, and the last time I..um..ma..well lets just say at school the electricity went out at an inconvenient time.

The dreams haven't come back much but this is worse..is someone stalking me..but that doesn't make anysense I mean, what, do they have a microwave gun?

It just sounds so stupid..

Lucifer managed to see me washing my sheets..  I'll kill her if she talks, but now she can hold it over my head..at least she wont set my homework on fire.

Love,

Sky

Growing Up is the Energy of the Future: Prolog

These have a lot of embarrassing things in them, but the important stuff is wrapped right up with the worst of the embarrassing stuff.  I want someone else who has to go through something like this to know that they aren't alone. I am cleaning up some typos, but that's it.  This is my journal as I wrote it then.
---- Originally posted 2007/9/3 ---

Hi Blogger, I am Sky Estella Branwenn Angwusnasomtaqa the Third, Mistress of the Far Void and Lord of the Western Marches.

Okay not really.  As far as I know, I am neither nobility nor Native American..so my name is just "Sky Estella Branwenn".

But I guess you sort of already know that as I entered my name when I made this thing.

Not really sure what I am supposed to put here..and I think I'm too shy to let anyone read it.

School is about to start and it will be nice to see my friends again.  I just got back from a really cool trip to Japan.  Mom is a total Japan geek, shes always trying to push anime into the sociology of film classes she teaches. I kind of wish she would start dating again; shes not that old! and really pretty!

Okay, on this trip we went all over. Akkihaba..aki..er the district with all the cosplayers, was one of our first stops.  We must have looked kind of silly, taking lots of pictures, but there was lots of other touristy people there too.

I know Lucifer (That's my sisters real name.  She'll insist it's Lucy..but look on her birth certificate it's Lucifer!) tried to buy some hentai but she was foiled pretty quickly.  I think she did it more to annoy mom then anything.

Anyway that stuff isn't important! What is important is all the awesome stuff we saw. Like the mountains! I mean we have cool mountains here, Mt. Hood, Mt. St. Helens. (Who was St. Helens anyway? Did she like blow people up for Christ or something?) Mt. Tabor isn't really a mountain..but the coast range is made of mountains, I would say. But the mountains in Japan were awesome! I mean Mt. Fuji of course with its smooth shape and all, but really most of japan is one big mountain range covered in trees! I love trees!

Whats also cool is in the shrines especially the ones on the mountains. The shrines even have real life mikos and whatever male Shinto priests are called. I really like the red and white outfits they have. Its kind of silly that I find them so sexy..I mean Shinto is all about purity and such. But they are just so cute!

Mom dragged us to a whole bunch of shrines. I think that's something Mom loves even more then anime! She has a ton of books about different religions and cultures and we would celibate all sorts of strange holidays at home, like Khordad Sal.  I guess it makes sense given that she majored in Anthropology in college.

One of the bigger shrines was one that used to practice human sacrifice..or at least that what I heard..I didn't have the courage to ask the miko about it.  The miko at that shrine was kind of scary. She seemed nice but she looked at me strangely, like she was trying to size me up.

Also, she clearly loved her job. Like maybe even too much.  Ahh, that doesn't make sense.
That night was when the dreams started.

I've always had strange dreams but I almost never had nightmares, and never more then once.
That night, well, I..I wet the bed I was so scared, and that was after I woke up.

Wow, I am kind of surprised I can write that.  I mean you don't get much more embarrassing then a 14 year old admitting they wet the bed.

Well, I think I am just putting off writing about the dreams them self.  Okay hear goes:
I wake up, but I'm tied down, strapped to a giant log, I can't lift my head to see how long it is, but I know it was at least 30 jou long.  I was scared, but ready to die. I knew that my death would bring prosperity to the land.

A priest stood up from where he was just tying the last strap, and then the tree trunk started to move, tipping slowly into the channel carved for it..falling towards the lake, moving faster and fast, I can't help it I scream out in terror, I don't want to die, I don't want to die.

The log changes beneath me into a snake, a snake even bigger then the log, I know, somehow, that the snake goes all the way from the foot hills to the top of the hills.  The straps are gone, and I notice that now I am back in my own body, I was a boy when I was tied to a log, a boy that thought in Japanese.

Now I am in the Garden of Eden, reaching out to an apple tree, the snake is still there telling me that I need the apple, that she (I can tell somehow the snake is female)  needs me to take the apple.

Only the apple is on fire, no, that's not bright enough, the apple is burning, white hot, a miniature sun that burns away my arm as I bring it too my mouth, I can feel it falling down my throat as my body burns up from head to foot.

And then I am nothingness, just a presence in void that doesn't even have the idea of going on forever..there is no place here, no infinity for it to stretch in.

And then I notice that there are two angels fighting..or maybe they are devils. One is the most handsome man I have ever seen, tanned skin stretching over perfect muscles, and even though he is nude, it's like he's in the most sophisticated suit I have ever seen, on his side, just above his hip, an arrow is stuck, the wound bleeding freely.  From his back tendrils of flame are flowing into the void, combing into a disk of golden-white light. The way his muscles flex over his shoulder, the sound of his deep voice, is overwhelming.  Even growling in anger and pain, his voice wraps around me, I could listen to it forever.

It seems like he is losing, his face is contorted in pain and the other angel has pushed back his limbs pinning him 'beneath' her.

She is beautiful, taller even then him, strong, but with a layer of fat over her hard muscles, her breasts pull my eye, full, hanging from her chest like fruit, they should be too much, but they fit her body, combing with the curve of hip to form a perfect figure.  Like an image of strong mother hood, of a fertile body, of of sex and babies, and life, hungry and consuming, bounties and giving. Her wings stretch out, blacker then the void they sit in, long and powerful, smelling of fresh rich soil.

They cry out again, and I realize its not only in pain. There hips are locked together, wet with sweat and other fluids.
As soon as their screams of anger and ecstasy start to fade, and white light shines from with in her body, a ball of light that quickly fills the whole void, burning even my non-existent presence away.

And then I am the boy again, slamming into the lake, my body screaming in pain as the water pours into my lungs, I can feel my broken ribs bend under the force of the water as I plunge down down away from the light struggling against the darkness and the pain.

And that's when I woke up and wet the bed.

So yeah, weird dream..but then I had it again, and again.  Three times in the past 2 weeks.
Well uh..bye Blogger!

Love,
Sky E. Branwenn